Bending the Rules

Kevin Curtis was mauled by Rodderick Hood to end the Eagles season. Coming out of the break Kev's body is flailing while he is falling down, he awkwardly lunges away from Hood's hands which are all over his back trying to drag him to the ground and as he goes to reach for the ball he can't even extend his arms. Other than a quick comment by Aikman about how interference could have been called, little was said and the game ended. All was well and we're celebrating the Cards in the Super Bowl as it's the greatest thing to happen in the NFL.

My offensive minded objectives were obliged three years ago after the Patriots decided the only way to stop the Colts offense was to tackle their receivers all the way down the field. The Patriot defense held their way all the way to a Super Bowl championship in 2004, but the groping ways of defense were soon to change. An officials emphasis was made pre 2005 and defenders were forced to actually cover guys instead of the popular strip search technique. On the change Rodney Harrison was quoted saying "It's a tough rule. Every time you knock a ball down you have to hold your breath and look around (for a flag). I just think football should be football, stop favoring offenses."

The rule of pass interference has existed in professional football since the forward pass. Actions that constitute an interference call consist of contact by a defender who is not playing the ball and such contact restricts the receiver's opportunity to catch the ball, grabbing or hooking a receivers body, or arms in such a manor that restricts his ability to catch the ball, as well as playing through the back of a receiver in an attempt to get to the ball. The rule book continues to go into detail on not only pass interference, but defensive holding. So while defensive players throw out "just let us play football" remember that all games have structure and rules and raping a guy 10 yards down a football field isn't just playing, it's cheating.

It's been three years since the pass interference/holding change was instigated and officials are already allowing more and more contact. "Go defense!" The Redskins offensive staff turned in over 17 interference no calls on just me, not all of our receivers, just #47. I understand that officials get a hard time for making calls, but it is a major advantage for a defender to have his hands all over a receiver. Instead of having to honor a receivers ability to run a great route and make a move they sit and wait at a distance they think they can grab the guy and just figure they wont get called.

I guess that until every receiver starts throwing up their hands like Curtis does after this no-call, defenders will keep getting away with this. Check out the video and tell me this is not a blatant pass interference at the 1:10 mark...

Playoff Interviews: Brett Keisel

Brett Keisel: Talk to me about what you got going on man. Are these questions you made up?

Chris Cooley: Yes. In all my spare time. I don't think you'll have too hard of a time answering them.

BK: (laughs) Outstanding.
(In the midst of some early-conversation banter that has been edited out, Keisel mentions that he had just been sitting in an ice bath to aid his sore legs.)

CC: I don't understand how you can sit in an ice bath. Don't you guys practice outside?

BK: Yeah, but we didn't today. We were inside today. My legs are just worn out I guess. Do you ice?

CC: Uh, yeah. I definitely do. It sucks. We don't have an indoor facility, so when it's cold out I really don't like to get in the ice after we're done. But I can't imagine how tired you are ...

BK: Yeah, it's not too bad, I missed six games this year so I feel pretty good. I can't believe you guys don't have an indoor facility; all the money your owner has.

CC: I know. It's unreal. Well, we practice on, I guess we practice on a flood plane. There's a creek behind our field ... the only turf field we have is an ACTUAL AstroTurf field. I mean it's not even field turf so ... we usually don't use that one either.

BK: Maybe all you guys can chip in and get yourselves an indoor facility.

CC: (laughs) "Hey Dan, why don't we all give you some money and maybe build this thing." I was gonna tell you too, it's crazy that you grew up in Greybull (Wyoming).

BK: I know, 'cause you grew up in Powell right? (54.6 miles apart)

CC: I grew up in Powell ... I have little league wrestling medals with a grey bull. It's not a circle, it's a bull. Well it's kind of funny, we both grew up in Wyoming, we both went to college in Utah, my family all thinks that we should be best friends. Do you ever hear that? I'm like, I haven't even talked to him.

BK: We are best friends Chris, we just don't know it yet bro.

CC: Yep, that's right. We'll hang out this summer, huh?

BK: That'd be fun man. We should go fishin' like you could take me on the Shoshone.

CC: (laughs) We'll go to the bar.

BK: Yeah.

CC: We'll pick fights.

BK: LET's DO IT.

CC: I'm in, I'll be there.

BK: Alright, buddy.

CC: You got the BYU connection. I figured you could probably make some green jello with carrots.

BK: (LAUGHS) Broccoli jello?

CC: That's it, man. So just kinda quick on this 'cause its getting kind of overplayed out, but University of Utah, you guys played them every year and we played them every year. Do you think they should of had a shot? Or do you think if BYU would have made it [undefeated], do you think they should have got a shot?

BK: I do think they should have a shot especially when a team goes undefeated and beats some teams, one team that was considered the top team in the country for a significant amount of time in Alabama, so I think they should get just as much shot as anyone, but all of this could have been easily been played out in a playoff in my opinion.

CC: Yeah, I think you're right. I think that's what it has to get to but it just doesn't seem like it will. Whatever.

BK: Well they should get a shot. No other team in the country, that I'm aware of, at least Division, I went undefeated, and they spanked Alabama so ...

CC: Whatever. When [the Steelers] played us at home this year my brother and I were talking and compared it to when BYU came to Logan (Utah State), there were that many fans in our stadium. It was embarrassing. Honestly, I'm sick about the terrible towels.

BK: Yeah, we have a great tradition of traveling Steeler nation fanatics. That's one special thing about playing in Pittsburgh is any time we go anywhere, somehow some way our fans seem to find tickets and seem to be competitive in filling the seats along with the home teams fans. So I love our fans. Definitely.

CC: Yeah, that's cool. You guys have crazy fans. Do you have any weird stuff happen to you? My new thing right now is every time I go to dinner people wanna shake hands with me ... while I'm sitting at dinner. The fan thing. Do you have any ...

BK: Doesn't that bother you?

CC: That's my biggest pet peeve.

BK: Especially when you're sitting down to eat you have food in front of you, that you're going to be putting in your mouth and some guy just walks out of the bathroom and wants to shake your hand.

CC: I know.

BK: I don't like that either.

CC: He's got his hand on his [private parts] probably.

BK: That's nasty. That is NASTY. No, but our fans our pretty cool. Most the time they don't mess with us too much but you know, we get things all the time where you just want to be alone and, um, someone kind of shows up and wants you to take a picture, or it's somebody's birthday or something like that. You know, try and make you feel obligated to do something.

CC: Yeah, I mean, you can't say no.

BK: Right.

CC: Alright. So I was just talking to Kevin Curtis and all of Philadelphia's team is growing beards right now. Who grows a better beard on your team, you or Ben (Roethlisberger)?
BK: Me by far. If you go back and look, I mean Ben is starting to mature and starting to grow a better beard, but when we won the super bowl he had that thing going so maybe it'll help them win. I don't know, but, uh, definitely me.

CC: That guy gets crazy concussions. Does he ever say anything wild when he gets knocked out?

BK: Yeah, it's kind of funny to mess with him a little bit. You know it wasn't so much what they were saying, but they come to the sidelines and they wanna know where they are, what they're doing and why are all these people screaming. (laughs)

BK: So I find that somewhat hilarious but you know ... we see it a lot, don't we, Chris?

CC: Yeah, every week.

BK: Every week.

CC: You gotta feel good about being the only team in the playoffs that doesn't have a bird mascot. I mean if it came down to the mascots you'd obviously win.

BK: Yeah, I think that interesting. Um, you know, we're playing a bird, um, if we win we're playing another bird so ... I don't know where the birds came from. Or how all the sudden they got to be mascots. I do like the Eagles 'cause I'm an American, but a Raven or a Cardinal I never knew those were tough birds.

CC: It really doesn't seem that tough.

BK: No it doesn't.

CC: Let me ask you this. Obviously everyone's impression of you is going to be, you know, a conservative, blue collar white dude. But do you have any sack dance, anything cool you're going to do? I'm assuming you're going to score a touchdown defensively. Do you guys have anything planned out?

BK: We don't have anything choreographed as of yet. We still have two days to prepare, two days to work on something, but uh, last week it was fun when I put Rivers down I had to go rowing down the river. I just thought that was a fun dance to do, but a lot of people said it was horrible and I looked really white doing it.

CC: Mmmm, I think anything you do is good. I mean if your incorporating the quarterback you could definitely, uh, simulate a pair of tweezers this week.

BK: Ya, ya, (laughs) that's nice man. Real nice.

CC: Yeah, thoughtful. Do you think this could be a game where the offense doesn't score a point?

BK: I wouldn't think so. Just because I have a lot of faith in our offense, um, I hope their offense doesn't score a point. That would be outstanding, but, uh, no I don't think so. Not with the athletes that the NFL has today. You know guys that ... playing on offense would blow my mind if you had a 0-0 game going into overtime, but stranger things have happened.

CC: Yeah, I'm guessing at least defensive touchdowns will be scored.

BK: Yeah, I think so too. I think so too.

CC: Alright dude, last question. A kind of fun thing on our bus and in our locker room are the "what if" questions or "what would you do?" questions. I know you can take this to extremely vulgar levels, cause we definitely did ...
CC: This year I did the website and it was the first year that I have really done it, and I was learning and I think everyone kind of already knows this, but I posted naked pictures on accident ...

BK: NICE man.

CC: ... on the internet.

BK: Naked pictures of you?

CC: Yeah, well, there was no face involve but there was [JUNK] so that was a real treat.

BK: WOW.

CC: Would you trade full frontal nudity for another Super Bowl ring?

BK: Yes.
CC: No questions asked?

BK: No questions.

CC: Ha. I love it. I love it. A real team player.

BK: That's right. That's right. I really want another ring. I don't wanna have four fingers left, I want to fill up the whole hand.

CC: Sounds good.

BK: So maybe that will cost me five frontal nudities. I don't know.

CC: (laughs) You'll definitely have to meet with a psychologist. I can tell you that from experience.

Playoff Breakdown Eagles vs Cardinals

Playoff Breakdown Ravens vs Steelers

Notes from Philadelphia and Baltimore weeks

I brought my own notebook to meetings throughout the season to basically write down the "footballisms" that occur every day.  It was the relevant, but not really that relevant stuff. Thought it was at least something cool to look at.  The two pages are from Wednesday meetings when we introduced the team we were playing.  IE the Ravens and Eagles.  You may have to click on the pictures to get a better look at the handwriting.

Playoff Interviews: Terrell Suggs

We want to thank Terrell Suggs for taking the time to do this interview for the Cooley Zone. Terrell is a great guy as well as an outstanding football player. So congrats to him and the Ravens for making it to the AFC championship. Hopefully you guys enjoy this one as much as our Celek interview and make sure to check out the audio at the bottom of this post. You gotta hear the part where we discuss the caterpillar that rests below his QB's forehead.

Suggs: Hello.

Chris: Hey whats up dude,  this is Cooley.

Oh whats up Chris, whats hot.

Whats up how you doin' man?

I'm chillin' man I'm just hangin'.

Dude, well thanks for doin' this. It's just for my website if that's cool with you.

No problem.

Alright so I just have a couple questions for you. Um the first one kinda goes back to the first of the year. Me and Jason Taylor were talking about you and um...

Ya.

...we started yelling T-Sizzle. And it kind of like stuck through out the year every time we saw each other we yelled T-Sizzle. "T SIZZLE!" and um, so we were wondering if guys on the team call you that?

They call me Sizz....or, ya they call me that. They call me Sizz or Suggs but mainly Sizz you know they just short it out. You know T-Sizzle, that's a lot of tongue work.

I know, but it's money.

(Laughs) I know (Laughs) but guys are gettin' kinda lazy, especially late in the year so its just Sizz.
Nice dude. Um....okay (Laughs) Do you have a sack dance or touchdown dance for this week cause if not we have an option for you.

Uh no I don't. What do you got?

You don't ever prepare one?

Say that again.

Do you ever prepare one?

No. Its kind of spur of the moment.

We think you should air fry. Like you should take a pan and air fry bacon...like Sizzle. (Laughs)

(Laughs) That'd be hot!

Maybe like 2 pans or maybe a pan and a spatula...

That, that'd be hot. Like a pan and have Ed write Sizzle

YES! I don't know if anyone would get it but I would definitely get it.

I think that'd be hot.

(Laughs) Nice dude. Alright. So um, this is kind of back to our game. Do you laugh when you line up over a tight end and it looks like a run play? Because you just pushed me in the backfield every time we ran the ball. I mean honestly, do you feel like a tight end could ever block you?

Ya there have been times when the tight end block me but we just don't wanna get embarrassed. You know you get your ass mauled by a tight end, that don't look good. You know cause ya'll are there to catch passes ya'll aren't there to block. You know so, we just try not to get embarrassed, but we don't laugh. But I did laugh when they brung in that center or whatever and put him at tackle. That was kind of hilarious. He was like 6 foot maybe 300 and something pounds and I was like "Oh my God. They got this guy at tackle."

I know and you beat him for a sack the first play. It was embarrassing.

Ya

We had no other option...

I know I know. Ya'll was down, ya'll was depleted. But I don't laugh man. I just try not to get my ass whooped.

(Laughs) Sounds good. Um what's up with Flacco's eyebrows? Do you think you could tweeze 'em out a little bit. I can't even watch him on TV.

I think so definitely, for the simple fact that, you know he's gonna be the face of our franchise. He's gotta look like...he's gotta clean that thing up. Everybody loves a the quarterback. You know look...like I said. Look at Tom Brady he's been on GQ magazine like 7 times...on the cover. You know...you know whenever he's big he's big. He's dated all the hot actresses, all the hot models. If Flacco even wanna compete to that he's gonna have to clean that thing up a little bit.

I mean he's not that ugly, but he looks like a caveman with his eyebrows.
Ya, you know you gotta trim the eyebrows up just a little bit.

Seriously. So I just two more questions for you. The championship games involve three bird teams. The Eagles, Cardinals, and Ravens. Just comparing mascots, who would win and why.

Oh man I think our mascot would win for the simple fact of his name. You know his name is after Edgar Allen Poe. So you have some history there and anywhere you got history...you got tradition and we got a tradition of whoopin' ass so I think our bird would win. You know, no disrespect to the other two birds, we love 'em, and I think Poe would get 'em.

Nice dude. Last thing. I was just watching NFL Network and James Harrison arrogantly stated that Pittsburgh is the best defense in the league. Do you wanna rebut that or...just let it ride.

Naw, I mean, I think he can only say that cause he has a veteran offense you know. His offense is good enough that his defense, all they gotta do is not lose the game. You see what I'm sayin'so.... But with all respect due they got the number one, you know the number one in total defense but they just gonna have to prove that this week.

For sure man. Thanks a lot for doin' this I really appreciate it. 

Alright, thanks Chris

Later.

Playoff Interviews: Brent Celek

Congrats to Brent Celek and the Eagles on making it to the NFC championship. He scored a big touchdown yesterday helping take down the Gmen and now he visits The Cooley Zone for a interview.  Not only is he a great guy as well as a great dancer, he is also funny as hell.  We had a solid talk about the toughest D-ends, how bullshit 3-4 defenses are for tight ends and how we possibly have the worst bodies in the NFL.  At least it's obvious we're not on performance enhancers.

Cool - We watched you on film all year in the Redskins tight end room we had to have a nickname.  Obviously you have been called Tom before, but do you have anything else to go by?

Magnum PI -  Not really, guys joke around and call me Magnum PI.  I can't grow out the mustache, I've tried, it's so bad!

Cool - In our playoff analysis Colt Brennan boldly claimed you were "not only a great guy, but a great dancer."  Yoder and I confirmed you were the best.  Do you have any patented moves?

Magnum PI - I call it the single arm dumbbell press.  When I get annihilated and start to go back to that move I know it's time for the end of the night.  

Cool - Philly --- Best or worst fans in the game, you know I'm gonna say worst, but I'll give you a shot?

Magnum PI - There the best fans dude.  Best fans ever.  They're very critical and support us no matter what, but when things are good, there great.  

Cool - If this game had to come down to a WWF royal rumble Celek vs. Lenard Pope who wins and why?

Magnum PI- I would definitely win.  I would suplex him.  His long arms scare me.  I think he's like 6' 10", but I think I could take him.

Cool - I didn't catch one touchdown from our quarterback all season.  How were you able to get so wide open on the goal line?

Magnum PI  - I've only scored two touchdowns this year and both on the same play  Pass 64 Z corner.   I think the key on the goal line is to outside release everything.  Even if its a nine technique, outside release.  If the inside backer who is supposed to cover you sees you go outside he always think you are blocking and lets you go.

Cool - Before we played the Cardinals this season Adrian Wilson blurted out that he would kill me on the field in a radio interview.  Are you intimidated by his play at all?  If you're 1 on 1 in the open field do you juke or go head first?

Magnum PI - I think Adrian Wilson is a great player.  He got pissed of on a touchdown when we played them earlier this season and on the field goal the next play he absolutely almost ripped my helmet off. It scared me a little bit. I got to give it to him, he's a beast. (Sighs) I'm not a big open field juker so I would probably put my head down.

Cool - Kurt Warner will be praying pretty hard for a Cardinals win.  How do you overcome the will of God?  

Magnum PI - Haha. I think Dawk's gonna be praying harder for a Eagles win.  

Tomorrow morning check the audio feed of my phone call to Terrell Suggs on Shutdown Corner.  "It's hot." And stay with us for many more playoff interviews.

Monday Morning Tight End

Really this is the Monday morning chat room. Tanner joined me for our take on the weekends games. Also check back later today for exclusive Cooleyzone interviews including Brent Celek and others.

Chris: We (The Redskins) are 3-0 against the two teams in the NFC championship. It's tough not making the playoffs, but I'd rather shove my head up my ass than watch one of the two teams we beat celebrate a Super Bowl birth. Seriously, when Philly clinched it kinda felt like someone kicked me in the balls. I'm happy for some of my friends on both those teams, but I'm jealous as hell.

Tanner: After watching the Skins play this season there is one thing I learned, they played on the same level as the opposition against all but 3 teams. Those three teams played yesterday and 2 are still standing. Both the Steelers and Ravens beat the Redskins ass this year and I can't see them losing to either of the NFC teams come Super Bowl Sunday.

Chris: Although I can't stand to see purple in the championship, and after the terrible towel debacle in FedEx field I've grown a new hatred for yellow and black, but I think they are the two most deserving team right now. Both AFC defenses are unbelievable and should make for a crazy game in the AFC. Everyone knows defense wins championships and this may be the first playoff game ever to end in defensive scores only. Maybe they should just put Ed Reed and Troy Polimalu on the field and battle it out gladiator style, that's what it's gonna boil down to anyways.

Tanner: That would be interesting...the whole gladiator thing but if that were the case the game would be over in 1 or 2 seconds after Ed Reed ran up the side of Polimalu and stabbed him in the neck. He is the Achilles of his team for sure. But since they will actually be playing the game I we will get to see Ed, T-Sizzle, and the rest of the Ravens D dominate the Big Ben and the Steelers. I just hope that these teams don't beat each other up too much and give the lesser NFC teams a real shot at the title.

Chris: It will be a rough weekend for both quarterbacks. Too bad Pittsburgh's soft turf will be frozen when Ben's head hits it all day. And I'm not sure how right your gonna be about lesser NFC teams, if you remember earlier this year Philly put a beat down on Pittsburgh. This season there has been two Eagles teams, it just depends who shows up.

Tanner: Eagles....yawn. I just can't wait until the Cardinals win and Donavon McNabb says that the Eagles were still the better team in his post game presser. Then hopefully writes about how he should be in the Super Bowl. Plus if and when the Cardinals win, they will have to travel to Tampa for the Super Bowl. Everyone in the country knows that when a west coast team travels east for a game, their chance for victory goes way down.

Chris: Your way too far ahead of yourself. Philly also kicked the Cardinals ass earlier this season. I do think the game will be outstanding, but Philly wins. I can't disagree that the Cardinals have played great football, but if your Carolina and Boldin doesn't play, how do you explain leaving Larry so open all day. The guy may be the best offensive player in football right now. When I watch him go get the ball in the air I feel like I'm back at Utah State and he is a god of NFL.

Tanner: Whatever, either way we're gonna stick with Yoder's bird theory all around. Go birds! And Fitz is a god of NFL right now.

Chris: Go birds in the NFC, but the steel curtain will drop in the AFC. I'm going with James Harrison's self proclaimed best defense in the league to take down Baltimore.

Playoff Breakdown Steelers vs Chargers

Playoff Breakdown Giants vs Eagles

Playoff Breakdown Cardinals vs Panthers

Hockey on Friday night was a great success. Check out ten reasons why in the previous post!

Playoff Breakdown Titans vs Ravens