In a league full of glad-handing and ass slapping between competing teams, I actually care about the organization and fan base that has supported me throughout my 8-year career
Help us give cancer the middle finger. Buy this shirt and all proceeds with go to the American Cancer Society.
The 3rd Annual Cooley’s for the Cure will be held on Monday, October 10. The event will be at Clyde’s in Ashburn. This year proceeds will go to two different organizations
If you are ever in Leesburg, VA please come check it out. 12 South King Street
Sunday, March 29, 2009
Thursday, March 26, 2009
Many have been touched by cancer in some way and we all have the power to make a difference. On April 14, 2009 Nancy, myself and Chris Cooley will host Cooleys Rally for the Cure. This event is being held to raise money for research of this horrible disease and 100 percent of the money raised from this event will be donated to the Relay for Life! To purchase a ticket please click on the photo.
The event will be held at The Original Steakhouse in Ashburn, Virginia. Check back soon for more information.
Together, we will celebrate, remember, and fight back. Thanks for your support!
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
Monday, March 23, 2009
I apologize for the harsh comment I sent you CC, but it is bad being a Cleveland fan sometimes with all the bullshit we have to deal with. So, when I mistakenly took your comment as a bash of our city and organization, hopefully you can understand why I thought this way. I'm a diehard fan and we have been through so many losses, and heart breaks that it gets real frustrating. So I apologize again to you Chris and to Redskin fans, I respect your play, and would love to have you in Cleveland, but everyone here gets sensitive when it comes to our Browns because of our history of bad luck. Thanks again man. It was a mistake and obviously a misunderstanding because the comment was made clear the first time.We posted the first email from Dennis and felt like it would be good to post his second.
P.S. That was not me who posted those things above about you still being a douchebag. Thanks.
Your a f***ing douchebag. How you gonna talk shit about Cleveland like that? I hope we do trade for your ass just so I can boo you during home games. Grow up and be a professional. You never know we're your gonna end up this is the NFL so talking shit about a city you might end up in is kind of idiotic. I used to have a good impression of you and be a fan. Now I see what a faggot primodonna you are. Peace hom0.
Dennis - FROM CLEVELAND
I'm glad that I have a chance to respond to you, as well as the many other outraged Cleveland fans that have commented on this site. I was nothing short of amazed when the comments to the trade rumor post soared past the 200 mark, but embarrassed for multiple Browns fans with their outrageous remarks. Dennis, you and many others accused me of talking shit about the Browns. The comment that I made was "I would be pissed if I got my ass shipped to Cleveland." Now if I would have made one negative statement about the Browns organization, the players, the team, or even the city I would have agreed with you. I clearly did not.
Dennis, by your brilliant writing style and obvious intelligence I should be surprised that you took my comment out of context, but I guess you just never know. So for you I will clarify, really all I was saying was that I do not want to leave DC. Any team or city could have been interchanged and I would have made the same statement. "I would be pissed to go to San Diego, Baltimore, or even New England." Nothing wrong with any of their teams, fans, or cities, I'm just happy where I am. Your, wait, (you're) kinda idiotic.
Oh! I almost forgot. John Elway wanted me to ask you how it felt almost getting to the Super Bowl? That must have been awesome!
To everyone else who commented on the fantastic comments. First class, all the way! I had no clear opinion what amazing fans you guys were, but now I have a definite jealousy of anyone wearing that beautiful orange helmet. Gooooo Browns!
Thanks Extreme Skins
Saturday, March 21, 2009
Wednesday, March 18, 2009
CHRIS: Nothing on television is better for me than the first two days of bracket watching greatness. The best part being that I know absolutely nothing about college basketball or really basketball on any level. Well I guess I know a couple things. One, I'm awesome at shooting 3's and two, I will dominate Tanner in our head to head bracket challenge. I know I have a couple crazy scenarios, but if I'm going to win it might as well be in a landslide. To be honest, I nearly picked Utah State all the way, it took a lot of self discipline to stick with Memphis. For some reason I feel good about Syracuse, again I don't know anything, but they did look good in the Big East tournament and that's good enough for me. Hope everyone had as much fun watching ESPN and making as many educated first round decisions as I did.
It's laughable to think that I could lose to Tanner. I'm 100% confident. Wawawow.
TANNER: The great thing about my bracket is the fact that I have 2 Big East teams and 2 ACC teams fighting for their shot at the title. Sorry Rob Lunn, but I have your Huskies losing to N.C. in the title game. I feel good about this pick and after seeing the President's bracket today, I feel that I am in good company. Prepare to lose Christy...I mean Chris
Trade talk is a weird wake up at 6:30. Obviously something was said between teams to cause this internet trading shit storm. I would be pissed if I got my ass shipped to Cleveland. But seriously, when the internet is the first news I hear about something this big I would hope it to be speculation. Really, it could have been a couple owners bullshitting and joking around about guys and someone leaked it. No big deal. I would be blown away to hear anything more. It is nice to read extreme skins posts about not wanting me to go. Thanks!
By the way, I do get to hang out with John Elway a little bit this weekend at the Dulles Sports Expo in Chantilly VA. I'm gonna bring a ball and ask him to smoke one for me.
Tuesday, March 17, 2009
Ironically—and certainly regrettably—the team actually had to turn a few actors away. With the waiting room and lobby still filled to capacity after 3PM, the group realized that they'd have to cut off any additional sign-ins in order to wrap up by 5PM. "The hotel was extremely gracious to allow us to use the space," said Goodmiller, "but we did have to keep our end of the bargain and be out by 5PM." He added, "Some of the auditions were a bit loud; we didn't want to scare the hotel guests. Literally."19W marketing specialist Nancy Yee elaborated. "Unfortunately, one of the inherent risks with the open casting call format is the steady stream of arrivals throughout the day," she explained "We obviously hoped to see every single person who came out. The guys were averaging about 14 auditions per hour, which was about as fast as we could hope for." Nonetheless, those who couldn't make it to the audition in time are encouraged to email headshots and resumes, and to submit their auditions online via YouTube—where the team had already received submissions from as far away as Spain and Sweden, even before the casting call doors were opened.
The producers and everyone at 19th + Wilson sincerely thank everyone who came to the audition, the Topaz Hotel for providing the venue, and the extended team who tirelessly dedicated their entire weekend to this successful event.
Monday, March 16, 2009
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
Alex Karras moved from # 7,597(I was surprised he was that high) to #3,203
Chris Cooley moved from #246,368 to #165,712 (surging past Flo, the waitress from Dumb and Dumber)
Tanner Cooley moved from #1,015,929 to #358,918 (surging past Art Monk, who could forget his role in Jerry Maguire, "nice game Rod")
I think we are better than this, so I'm challenging you to go to work on IMDB, searching Alex, Chris, and Tanner and moving them up the Hollywood ladder. Here are the goals I've set for us to reach in the next week (help us baby Jesus, help us Tom Cruise, help us Maxim.com!)
Alex #1899 - 1 spot above Eugene Levy
Chris #29,967 - 1 spot above Brutus "The Barber" Beefcake
Tanner # 69,569 - 1 spot above legendary Sportscaster George Michael (who could forget him in Silence of the Lambs, I sure haven't and I remind him whenever I see him.)
Here are the winners from the contest. You can claim your prize by venturing over to my site http://www.fatpickled.com/, bookmark it to your favorites, then email me.
1st place - And winner of a signed 8x10 of Fatpickle is...Randow who came up with the combination of Pat (from It's Pat) and Gridiron.
2nd place - And winner of a signed 8x10 of Vladimir is...Xstatic4beer who not only has an awesome handle, but also gave us Uncle Buck and Big Wig.
3rd place - And the winner of a signed 8x10 of the man currently over 150,000 spots behind Paula Deen on the Starmeter(in his defense she can do things with a green bean that is heaven) is...Tony Corsini who brought us Spicoli and The Helmet Knocker.
Congrats to all, there was some really good ones and it was a difficult choice.
Cheers and Hail
Tuesday, March 10, 2009
All week, our Austrian teammates told us that we were invited to the "Uni-party." I thought maybe I was hearing them wrong, but I didn't know what I Uni-party was. Turns out it was the "University Party." The part to kick off the semester.
So its finally Friday night, practice lets out, and its time to go. We hop in our car (the worst car in ALL of Austria.
1) Austrians take their beer very seriously
2) Never call an Austrian person German.
As the beer starts to flow, one story I was told by a teammate stuck out..
I asked Danielle, "So why American Football...why not soccer for you?"
"It is because, vell...I like to hit somebody....ya. I like to smash them"
"Ya you can't smash them in soccer, but in football...ahh beautiful, no one gives a fuck, yah!"
(I'd like to argue with him, but this Austrian just gave the Cliff-notes on why everyone should play football instead of soccer)
but then Danielle (a 6'5 185lb receiver) said something even better...
"So, I know NFL Players"
"What?" I said, almost choking on my beer.
"Ya, my girlfriend iz...umm...American-Samoa"
"And her mom asked me, "Danielle-you play American football" and she vas on ze phone with her coo-zin, so I said "jah, I play American-Football" so she puts me on ze phone viz dis guy. And he said, "Allo! I am in NFL"
So I said, "Oh! Can you get me Patrick Willis's Jersey and Autograph!"
So he said, "Sure"
So I said, "Who is this?"
and He said, "Shawne Merriman"
so I said, "Oh, okay. Make sure ze Willis jersey is a large. Danke!"
He asked Shawne Merriman for a Patrick Willis jersey. Holy shit.
Only in Austria.
Saturday, March 7, 2009
After watching that I can list four people more excited than T.O. about the recent signing.
For more check out the Easterns Blog. Ovi dances.
Thursday, March 5, 2009
That being said. This practice would best be described as the best high school football team in America meets The Longest Yard.
(I can hear the movie trailer now)
In a world where football is secondary, and soccer is king. A group of rag tag rogue athletes gather. Neither sleet, nor snow, nor age, nor mis-matched practice jersey can quench their insatiable thirst....FOR PAIN!!!
I kid, I kid. Sort of.
They (the Austrians) have a remedial knowledge of football, but a deep love for the game. The linemen are linemen, strong and athletic. They can play. (Well, if they knew how to play, they could play)
There are a few local defensive linemen, that (after 5 years of college football) I am sure could challenge for a spot on a Division I or Division IAA starting lineup.
This is the rainy season in Klagenfurt, Austria. So our first practice was met with a torrential downpour. As practice went on, I noticed that the rain wasn't even an issue. It was a non factor. I cant tell you how many times I've heard Division I players whine about playing (let alone practicing) in the rain. But not here. I loved the drive.
Cultural differences? They are a-plenty. As player/coach I called a water break. I ran over to the cooler. I saw them drinking a brownish liquid, thought to myself, "Well that is unlike any Gatorade I've ever seen." And then..was that? It is...steam. Steam from a water cup?
It was not Gatorade.
It was not Water.
It was...HOT TEA.
Hot tea at a water-break. I never thought I'd see that in any of my years playing football. Which lends legitimacy to the American's rallying cry, "T.I.A.!!!"....THIS. IS. AUSTRIA! In fact, I'm still chuckling. (What an experience this is.)
I guess through college, although fat, I carried myself with a "swag." I knew I played football, and in America, playing football is cool. Alright, I said it. Playing football is cool, you are the biggest and strongest guys around. You stand out. That's simply just not the case here. Soccer is king. Without question. Some might see that as an impediment to success, but I see it as working in our advantage. These local players grew up playing soccer, so they can all run. The other things is that the draw to the game (for the Austrians) is not to be cool They are out there because the LOVE the game. It is a cult following, and there is they are all going against everything popular culture tells them. Their sense of pride is extraordinary. The over paid, pampered athlete, is a myth. It doesn't exist on the (American) football field. They are living in a view of disdain almost everyday.
You know the worst part? When these guys are at the university, and they tell girls that they play "ze American Football" the chicks don't think its cool. In fact, Frauline is probably all like, "ya American football is for pansies..." followed by, of course "vere iz da Men's Tennis player I vas talking to earlier?"
Today's FWG moment?
Well, I took my shirt off and the Austrians all go “ahhhhh! Zat iz why you are ze fat white guy”
Our first scrimmage is 5 days away. Check back soon.
Our initial knee-jerk reaction to the news that Terrell Owens had involuntarily gained his freedom from the Cowboys was that Owens would most likely land with the Redskins or the Giants.This is great news for us Skins fans but still leaves us wondering, where will he go. So please share your thoughts on the recent TO situation. Which team will he implode next?
And, already, both teams have reportedly said no.
Chris Mortensen of ESPN reports that the Redskins have issued an adamant “no thanks” regarding the possibility of signing Owens.
Wednesday, March 4, 2009
Rob Lunn, if you haven't read on his site, is in Austria getting ready to play some "American Football." He has recently written "Meet the Austrians" and "Welcome to Austria" where he introduces Ramon, who I am very intrigued to learn more about. But before all of this, he wrote about his journey getting there. While in Chicago he sent us this video.
For those who have grown to love FWG as much as I have I hope you enjoy his writings about his experience up till now. I'm sure we will get some very interesting stuff as he continues his journey. Good luck Rob.
A about 18 months ago one employee of the website pranked the other by doing this. Pretty great stuff right? I remember seeing that way back when and have thought nothing of it until now. Check out the retaliation that happened at a recent Maryland basketball game...
I love the fact that he runs around on the court like losing his mind until finally seeing who presented the check. I can't wait to see what's next.
$500,000 to work out between the months of March and June - just to work out. Then an upcoming salary of $9,000,000 - for one season of play. One season! You would really have to hate to be somewhere to turn down ten million dollars for the next ten months of work. I mean, I know Miami is pretty nice, but just go ahead and make that much money while you still can and then retire anywhere you want. Hell, I would go play in Russia for 10,000,000. I would pack my bags and fly out tomorrow, "Ill see ya in February."
Jason allegedly turned down the $500,000 offer to work out with the Redskins for the off season. When the request was denied the Skins released his rights for the last season of his contract. This was obviously no surprise to JT, who wanted to stay with his family, where they live in Miami.
Now I feel like I'm judging too much and I definitely can't be that guy. Last off season I had a workout bonus of $100,000 to make 80 percent of my workouts and didn't reach it. Granted I got married and missed 10 days for my honeymoon, but I also took a week trip for Drew Brees charity. I was still very close to making the percentage. So just stating the facts of the off season program that I have been a part of for the last five years will suffice.
We will have actual workouts starting on March 16th going into May. These are the weight lifting, running, gaining strength at the gym type of workouts that anyone would expect. Of course we work very hard, but when I go into Redskins park for this type of work I spend no more than three hours in the facility. The requirements for each week are to workout four days and it can be for any four days throughout the week. Mon - Thurs, Tues - Fri or whatever combination of four days you want to make, this schedule also allows a four day weekend every week. Between the months of March and April there will be 28 of these required workouts. As May begins we get into what is called an OTA schedule.(Optional Training Activity) These will be like mini practice days. We will meet in the morning and install plays for the first couple hours, have quick lunch, then go on the field for about an hour and a half. The practices are at a quick tempo, but we wear only helmets, so little contact is involved. The day will usually last from 9 in the morning until 3 in the after noon. The requirements for the off-season end June 12. The total amount of optional/mandatory days is 52.
For JT to reach his 75 percent requirement of the deal would have had to be hear for 39 days. Had he arrived and worked for the 39 days he would have been compensated $12,820 per day. That is unreal to me! Most people pay their own money to go to the gym, but almost 13 thousand dollars a day is a pretty good membership in the other direction. Again, I will not judge this decision and I have no idea what his bank account could possibly be, but that's a shit ton of money. As for my end of the off season, I will be required to make 42 days to reach my bonus. I again would receive a check grossing $100,000. This would pay me $2300 per workout. Still pretty awesome and enough to get me into the gym.
Tuesday, March 3, 2009
Athletes are also paying back Uncle Sam at a blistering rate. I just got done putting my tax information together for last year and will be paying right at half my gross income of 2008 to the federal and state government. May be hard to imagine, but I can put the facts together for everyone. I first of all received bonus checks which are taxed on the highest level (through the last two and a half years I was paid in bonus, a gross of 14 million dollars - anyone can google that - the net of the checks will be just under 8 million dollars). I then received salary, but not only is the salary taxed by state and fed, it's also taxed by the state and sometimes the city we play in. Who doesn't want to file for Cincinnati or Philadelphia income tax? I also go ahead and pay a Medicare tax. Oh, and lets not forget our friendly car and home taxes - over 30,000 a year for me, fun times. So before I, or any other players think about spending money, we must consider that we will forfeit close to 50 percent of our earnings.
That being said, don't think for a second that taxes or the poor economy is causing football players to sit on the rest of their money. They're spending it! Cars, houses, clothes, food, women, jewelry and all of it at a rapid pace. This isn't just a guess, this information comes from five years of watching how lavishly players live and how much guys spend, myself included. Normally this spending pattern isn't condoned and by no means does it excite someone who has a hard time putting food on the table, but right now rich people spending an ass load of money is a big part of what our economy needs.
Let's also consider what the market needs for any type of a bottom, or a rebound. Well I guess I can't consider myself enough of an expert to start to explain that but, I'm thinking if we could get someone to stop selling off all their shit and start buying back in I think we would have a start. So if I was receiving a enormous contract this year I may figure it would be a great time to buy some 50 -75 percent off stock.
Huge contracts for athletes mean one thing. Shit tons of money will be poured back into our country. You think these guys are slow play investors who will sit on their money like a goose. Absolutely not, their money is being spent, no questions asked.
Monday, March 2, 2009
email@example.com and/or firstname.lastname@example.org.
Special thanks to the Hotel Topaz in Washington DC for hosting our casting call.
Project: Feature film (Red One)
Location: Metro DC area, Virginia
Pay: Ultra low budget SAG agreement
Audition Date & Location: March 14th & 15th 10am-5pm both days, HOTEL TOPAZ: 1733 N Street, NW, Washington, DC 20036
Comments: Project marks the debut of NFL's Washington Redskin player, Chris Cooley as Executive Producer.
Opening title credit roles:
Brett, 30's male lead. The ghost hunter who is ridden with guilt over not being there for his wife when she died in the hospital. A man who's looking for redemption after he realizes he's focused on work more than his family.
David, 40-50, male. A critic of Brett and debunker of paranormal activity. Brett's annoying antagonist whose only friend is a bottle of scotch.
Jen, 20's, female. Jen is on the ghost hunting team and wants to believe in the afterlife becuase of a dark secret from her past. However, she's not exactly fearless and getting through the night on a gig is challenging for her.
Richie, 20-30's male. Richie is on the ghost hunting team and is in it for the money. His sense of humor helps ease the tension during an investigation.
Kurt, 30's, male. Kurt is Brett's best friend and was there with Brett's wife the night she passed away.
Travis Garner, 40-50, male. Travis is the mysterious client and homeowner who makes Brett a guarantee that he'll find the evidence he's been looking for.
“There are no excuses for what we did today,” said veteran Caps forward Matt Bradley. “Every guy was not prepared and we didn’t play a tight game at all. It’s disappointing when you have such a good game against Boston yesterday and come back with an effort like this. So we’re all individually going to have to look at ourselves and how we prepared and why we weren’t ready for the game.”Not only that, the Panthers seemed to surround the Caps goal the entire first period. Fans even booed goalie Jose Theodore during the Panthers penalty shot. Though he made a great stop, the team went into the 2nd period down 4-1 and Theodore was replaced by Neuvirth.
The rest of the game was pretty much filled with Panthers power plays and disappointed Caps fans. A woman sitting behind me wasn't frustrated at the play, rather she was mad at the fans around her for the choice words they had for the referees. She did however, seem to cheer up every time the Caps were penalized because it gave her daughter a chance to see the guys up close. You can hear her cheer at the :13 second mark in this video.
Besides the tough loss there are a couple cool things going on in the next couple weeks if you are a Caps fan. Friday night Elliot from DC 101 will be hosting a celebrity bar tending event with Mike Green at The Front Page in Arlington. This should be a pretty cool event with a portion of all sales going to the So Kids Can program. Also, next Friday Green will be signing autographs at PSGameGear in the Dulles mall. If you want to meet the Caps defenseman, check it out.